I’m grateful for the free legal help from the Greater Chicago Legal Clinic, but my case was a missed opportunity. My attorney secured a mutual stay-away order quickly, but did not follow through on my request for a separate confidentiality agreement to further protect me from the release of private materials. Despite my attorney initially agreeing to present it, he decided not to and informed me of this decision at the official final hearing. This could have been pursued before settlement, especially since the respondent had a history of avoiding service, missed a scheduled final hearing causing a delay, filed for an attorney the very last minute and had no evidence against me, and every reason to avoid trial. This could have been used as leverage to get him to sign the separate agreement.
My attorney told me that Order of Protection courts do not usually handle such agreements but it was ignored that private agreements occur outside of court all the time. Such an agreement could have acted as an extra psychological barrier for the respondent, while also ensuring that any violation would give me a direct remedy, rather than leaving the outcome solely in the hands of the criminal system, where penalties primarily serve the state, not the victim.
My attorney also told me that sharing intimate images is “already illegal,” but that ignores the reality that laws only help after the damage(to my career and reputation) is done, and abusers rarely fear breaking them. Instead, the respondent was warned directly about such conduct, despite me voicing my concern that doing so could actually remind him of my vulnerability.
In the end, the respondent benefited from an agreement in his best interest, while I, the victim, was left with a “mutual” order implying shared responsibility for the abuse instead of just a standard one(which would’ve still served his interest). The respondent never once made an in-person appearance, despite being ordered multiple times to do so and yet, somehow, avoided trial altogether up until the very end.
Ultimately, my stay-away order gave me the minimum protection and clauses that otherwise reflected other concerns of mine, but these missed opportunities left me with less protection that could have been achieved given the evidence I had and low credibility of the respondent.
